Hey, SPU delivery!
Listen, it’s the same kind of package for P̸͡L̸AY̴͢E̢͘R̷̸ but please please please just take the damn package off of me, I don’t wanna be holdin’ onto this for any longer! There’s something SHAKIN’ in there dude! I felt it! It’s creeping the shit outta me and I really don’t get paid enough by SPU to be dealing with haunted or possessed shit!
Ya know the drill by now, no speakin’ the answer out loud and everythin’, yadda yadda yadda!
I dunno if it’s your friend ordering these boxes or someone’s sendin’ some fucked up shit to them as a joke, but I hope for both of your sakes that this stuff doesn’t end up blowin’ up in your faces. I don’t wanna be the person who unknowingly delivered a dangerous package to a pair of unwittin’ victims!
Anyways, I feel like if I stay around this thing for much longer I’m gonna end up cursed or suffer from some other horrible shit, so I’m outta here.
Don’t do anythin’ reckless with that damn box that puts yerselves in danger, ya hear me? I dunno if we’ll be seein’ each other again soon, but you better take care during whatever’s gonna happen next, dude! Don’t go dyin’ from some weird box on me now!