Well, I'm trying to pick just one memory but it's proving harder than in most years. This year was overall one of my best years in recent history, so I hope it's 'kay if I pick multiple things.
The worst of 2015 for me would be the incredible stress I've been put through especially by my parents.
They were "just worried for me" alright, but interacting with them has been Hell for nine out of twelve months (and some previous years). Their constant badgering me about things I had no control over (for example waiting for the results of my university applications) and trying to meddle with things that weren't theirs to take control over, not to mention the degrading comments and insults... well, I mean, sure... go ahead and tell me that you think I'll never get far in life and don't have what it takes to study. It's not like I'm trying to recover from depression and attempting to gain at least an ounce of self-esteem. Who needs self-esteem anyway?
I sure hope that 2016 won't have any of these exhausting moments where I'm curled up against my best friend at 4am, crying because my parents decided to have a go at me again for being lazy, ambitionless, selfish and unlikable. I sure can do without mom telling me she's surprised I have friends.
The best of 2015... there's a surprising lot to choose from, considering how stressful everything was. But here's a couple of things:
- I joined Reborn in April/May (depending on whether we're talking forums or showdown here), and oh dear am I glad that I did. I met so many amazing people here who I'd probably have never met otherwise, and I'm thankful for every single one of you. Both the game and the community have brought me a lot of happiness.
When I got here I was unsure if I'd stay, because I find it very difficult to try and integrate myself into new places, and I haven't become an active member of an online community in seven years. But I was determined to find a place here, and it paid off.
- Meeting my boyfriend. I mean, this one is kinda Reborn-related, but it certainly deserves special mention. I still can't believe I get to be with such an amazing person, and I'd never have met him if it weren't for this site and the game it spawned. I wouldn't trade those pun-filled 4am calls, silly running gags and the loud duck quacking in the background for anything. By the way, if you're reading this: You're still banned to the couch for the Tess thing. How dare you.
- I got accepted at WWU Münster, which is the uni I wanted to go to ever since I decided I wanted to study. After several stress-filled months, getting my letter was the most relieving thing that happened all year. It also meant I got to move out of my parents' house, and finally have a place all for myself. Which is another very relieving thing that's doing wonders for my mental health.
Last year I legitimately thought that I was never going to make it into uni ever. One year later, my wish came true.
- I applied and got accepted for a fairly important role on a site I've been member of for seven years now, and it's been extremely fun and rewarding so far. I never had the confidence to try out for it earlier, but I'm glad I did this year. It feels amazing to give back to a community that's been kinda like a second home for me. Also, my fellow team members are real sweethearts and I'm feeling very comfortable around them. This year seems to have been a good year for making friends <3
As difficult as the year started out it's kind of incredible for me to look back at how things used to be, and how far I've come. When I consider what place I was in a mere year ago, I find it hard to believe that I can really be as happy as I am now, and that things really did get better.
I didn't fully believe this until recently, and to have it come true is an unbelievable feeling.
For the next year I want to work on reducing my anxiety issues. I'm still a nervous wreck around people a lot of times, and it'd be nice to eventually be able to talk to others more comfortably. I mean, I can't always wait for others to make the first move, right?