Rosesong

I'm most definitely glad to have met you too Sheep, you're a fantastic friend~ Music is always good, thank you Dobby~ I'm pretty sure I'll still wilt at times, though I'll try not to, lol Mael, I don't mind the whole Petilil deal; I found it pretty awesome~ it doesn't feel like it's been that long either I know Dark, I'm woefully old ;~; my favorite instrument will always be my primary instrument, clarinet, though it's not the one I started on nor the one I play the most :x and thanks for the welcome!~

I know people don't normally post long things for something like this, but wow, I never actually expected to still be hanging around this place. It's been exactly two years since I entered this community, two years since I saw The Gamer's Tree's interview with Ame and becoming interested in the game that has lured all of us here. I remember exactly what happened my first year of being here; I made this account and hung out solely in Onyx Arcade with the Predict the Next Person to Post and Banned games, while occasionally bantering with Mael and others over my Reborn ingame team choices (I had a Spinda that I kept well into episode 10 as a main part of my team). Then, maybe 3 months in, I left. I was bored, and hadn't really found a reason to stick on the forums. Thus, I had decided to only come on occasionally to check for game updates. It was a little over a year ago that I returned to Reborn, primarily looking for updates to the game. That was the day, though, that Ame had introduced the quick link to get onto the Reborn server, located on PO at the time. My first day on the server, I was messaged by one of the current auth of the time, Kiozo, who welcomed me to the server. I accidentally wandered into Spear Pillar, where Cowtao, Jacze, Fezzdog, and Karpy (GyaradosKiller, for those wondering) welcomed me. Gradually, I began to meet more people and interacted with them more frequently. There are so many notable ones, but Dan was one of the first who PMed me and introduced me to a lot of the people I'm closest with to this day. As time went on, I downloaded the actual PO client rather than getting on via browser, and that's when the fun started. I 'eloped' with Hilda, and we had our marital spats in the middle of main chat all the time; Jacze decided to gift me with tentacles (and more recently, stuffed a sock in his mouth because I asked him to). Winter started to teach me competitive battling, but Sheep was the one who would sit and work with me, quizzing me on how I should create balanced teams and movesets for mons in order to better understand their roles on the team. While Sheep was teaching me, Notus would battle with me in an exchange of music and battling knowledge. While chatting in the lobby, I became the “butt” of the shipping thread, being paired with Hilda (I mean, we were married), Dan, Silver, Cowtao, Winter, TheScarletSword, Hukuna, ZephyrEnyalios, and Notus.** On the forums, I found myself becoming more active again as well; again, this was in the Onyx Arcade. While playing a game called King of the Hill, a fierce game of killing one another to claim this hill for ourselves, I began to get to know Stratos, Zephyr, and Notus even better. It was after some point when we had killed each other and had had tea party breaks from killing each other that Notus decided to make our ventures in that thread into an RP, and thus Under the Hill was born. A couple chapters in, Notus named me cohost, later to become host when he left for school (to you all, I'm still really sorry that it died. Maybe Notus and I can talk about a UtH reroll...). During my stint in the RP section, I got to know everyone's favorite sensei, Hukuna. In retrospect, this is sort of the intro thread I never made two years ago, so I'm just going to give a small blurb as to who I am. I'm a 21 year old musician starting her final year in college as a music education major. Pokemon has been a huge part of my life since I was 5, and I've played every game that's come out (although I've gradually been phasing out of video games). On the server, I've been told by multiple people that I take on the role of a caretaker; always making sure people are having a good day or trying to help them sort through their problems should things not be going well. My main goal is to try to put a smile on at least one person's face everyday; just knowing that I've made even the smallest impact brings a smile to my face. Considering I'm routinely thought of as a legitimate rose, I've taken it upon myself to clarify several times over that I'm of the thornless variety, donning blue petals rather than the more standard colors. This unique combination comes from thorns hurting people and blue petals being the least acidic that a flower can have; I feel that it symbolizes my actions in that I try never to hurt someone, either purposefully or accidentally though in BGO and Mafia, this is completely null and void; I'm a mean killer. Additionally, in Chinese culture, blue roses are symbols of hope, which I try to pass onto every person that I speak with. To be quite honest though, this thread is also my way of looking back at some of the best memories I've had since joining Reborn and fully becoming an active member of the community. I've met some of the best friends I could ever have hoped to meet, and somehow haven't managed to scare them away with the amount of worrying I do about each of them, which is quite the miracle. I also haven't managed to convince the server that I'm mean yet, which is another shocker. Though, I suppose these things take time, right? In all seriousness though, this thread is serving multiple purposes today. The first, as mentioned previously, is partially the intro thread I never made and to be nostalgic while walking down memory lane. The second is to allow anyone that wants to know something about me to go ahead and ask it here; should you choose to, I'll answer almost anything asked. The third and final reason is a thank you. Thank you to each and every one of you whom has taken the time out of your day to speak to me, be it a simple hello or a lengthy conversation. Through this community, I've made so many near and dear friends that I cherish, and I truly believe that through the interactions I've had with the people here, I've become a better person. So, thank you all so much for being the amazing people that you are and for all the kindness and caring that you've shown toward me. I really do appreciate each and everyone of you, and should you ever need anything all you have to do is shoot me a PM.

As with the previous CW work I presented, The "Perks" of Being a Wallflower, this is a reflection of something that I tend to feel sometimes. It's a way for me to understand the feeling and help pinpoint the reasons that this feeling can be prevalent in me at times. In no way should it be a cause for concern nor should people approach me over this, though feel free to leave feedback. Loneliness. That's all I feel, yet the crazy part is that I'm not alone-- not physically, at least. In reality, I'm surrounded by people, both online and in real life. It doesn't actually matter though; loneliness manifests regardless of how many people I have around me. I know why it happens, what causes the pangs of solitude to resonate throughout my entire being. Not being listened to is a principle factor of it, and one I can always see. Sure, people don't intentionally ignore you; I think this is something that we all can acknowledge and agree with. Regardless of intent though, it happens, be it not being acknowledged for giving simple information repeatedly when asked, yet acknowledging another for giving the same info, or forcing you to get angry in order for your voice to be heard. Despite knowing that it's unintentional, it hurts; balls of distress and agitation burrow deep within my stomach. Another present reason is feeling like you can't talk to anyone. Of course, that's almost always poppycock-- talking to people should be as easy as breathing. However, what happens when you begin to feel like an annoyance? What happens when you start to feel as though by opening conversation with someone, you're annoying that person to the bone, but they're too kind to say anything? Talking to someone and feeling that ball of worry that you're somehow making their day worse when just not talking to them wouldn't affect them... It creates a sense of isolation unlike any other. The only thing worse is when people talk to you because they need you, and then going back to ignore you. It can make one feel completely worthless at the core, unwanted and unneeded. I'm surrounded by a sea of people; people that mean well and people that I love and cherish. However, when the loneliness sets in-- the knots residing in my stomach, unnecessary worry, feeling as though walking on eggshells is a must, the uncertainty... It doesn't matter how many people there are surrounding you. In the end, it's just you, alone, fighting against your demons in vain.

Vinny, just why.

So many creative ships...

Happy birthday Arki! I know you're on your roadtrip right now, but even so you've become an indispensable, grammatically correct, music loving friend. May your birthday be a fantastic one, and... Did you hear about the planeload of conductors en route to the European Festival? The good news: The bad news:

You don't understand; this thread gave me 9! ships and then some that I didn't readily acknowledge. You gotta run

Run for the hills, this thread is scary

Oh yeah, forgot, but PyonXShadow Tack

Count me in friend; sounds like a blast!

Talking with myself? And apparently I have a popular b00ty...

With the selfie influx this thread is seeing, I present an end of trip selfie and a cat selfie once at home!

Whomever could have possibly thought that there are perks to being a wallflower was delusional. There are none; that phrase that we hear so commonly is a lie, a bunch of cockamamie that we tell ourselves to not feel bad. You must be confused; I can tell you're wondering how I would be able to make such a statement. Well, allow me to shed some light on this inquiry of yours. You see, I am a wallflower. Always have been, always will be. I can hear your protests. "You're not a wallflower," you proclaim to me, hoping to convince me of that simple notion. "You'll never be a wallflower as long as we're around." You may be unable to tell, but I am scoffing at you. Sure, you can say I'm not a wallflower and that I will never be, but can you truly assure it? I thought not. You see, there's no way for you to do so. Allow me to show you why I'm a wallflower through a rough analogy. You see, I'm that friend that you bring to a party. Do I know anyone there? No, I only know you, though you seem to forget about me almost immediately and go off in search of other friends. So, I do my best to blend in with the crowds. When I come to you to talk, you shrug me off because you're so engrossed in your current conversation that to acknowledge me would be rude to your other friends. When I tap at you two, three, even four times, finally you acknowledge me with a quick comment intended to placate me and quickly return to your prior conversation which still holds your interest; I fade back into obscurity. It is only when you realize that you've screwed something up that you seek me out. You want advice, help on fixing what you've done. Other times, it's to vent about who had wronged you. So, I, being the ever faithful friend to you, forget about having been ignored and take you away from the party, giving you a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and sympathy and support. Yet still after this, once your problems have been solved, I go back to being that wallflower, the one that isn't recognized unless needed for something. You're still trying to fight my claims, but to no avail. You see, my dear friend, I understand that I fill this role in your life; I'm the person whom you seek out because you know I could never and would never turn you away in your time of need. When the tables turn though, I am screaming into the void, trapped in a glass box and viciously pounding against the walls in a vain, fruitless effort to be heard, acknowledged, listened to. As you struggle to find a way to prove me incorrect, to show me the light in this situation, all I can do is shake my head and smile sadly. The truth of the matter is, there are no perks to being a wallflower. So for now, I'll fade back into the shadows, become the invisible plant that no one notices but is still watered, waiting to be needed again and placed back into the sunlight before the cycle repeats.

Remember we love you Zephy, and that all of our thoughts, prayers, and well wishes go with you and the rest of the Philippines. Stay as safe as you can, and should you disappear, we'll look forward to your hopeful return. Stay strong, dearest twin sister <3

Happy birthday Lost! Have a good one~

Ok, time to actually do this... Arkhidon: Arki, I'm glad I've gotten to know you. You're funny and always appreciate my bad music jokes when no one else fully understands them. Plus, it's always a blast sharing grammatical/English like things with you; the music shared is always awesome too (though we don't do that quite as often as we should). Skitty: I remember when I barely knew you, and you popped into my backchannel on the server and asked if you could hang out there. I'm glad you did that; you're one of the sweetest, kindest, and most caring people I've come to know during my stint here. I appreciate you to the fullest extent, and you will never be just "that girl that plays Pokemon" to me. Cowtao: Cow, should you read this (and I hope you do), you are a fantastic person that has time and again made me laugh with your crazy antics. We don't talk as much as we used to, but rest assured; I will always have pets and hugs for you, as well as be more than willing to protect you from becoming steak. Dan: Dear lord, where the hell do I start? You, time and time again, have listened to my bellyaching and groaning. Even when you knew I was upset, you always tried to put a smile on my face no matter what. You were the first person that I was able to call a friend on Reborn, and in doing so, you introduced me to many of the friends that I now love and cherish from here. I appreciate you so much as well as everything that you do. Please, never ever change. Hilda: Oml, you were my first ship here, and god did we have a blast. While we had our "marriage spats" on the server, I remember us dying of laughter in our PMs, constantly trying to play off of each other. Like you mentioned, we have had our ups and downs, but through that I think we both came to learn more about how communication is necessary. I would love to start talking to you more again; your wit and humor is hard to rival. Hukuna: The first time I actually interacted with you was in an RP gasp what a shocker. You're truly one of a kind, though I may have corrupted you and for that I'm so sorry. But your laughter is out of this world, as is the kindness and gigantic heart that you have. And don't you dare start saying that you don't deserve this or don't see this, because you deserve every word and I'll smack you when I get up to PA if you start Jericho: Regardless of what you say, you're a really great guy. You're always trying your damndest to be friendly and help everyone out, and it doesn't get past anyone how hard you work. Give yourself a break; no one, not even you, is perfect. Notus: We met in the Onyx Arcade, in that King of the Hill game, and wow am I glad I've met you. I love the battles we have, as they always force me to think hard and push me to be a better player. Plus, we exchange great music during our battles. I think I said this once, but the fact that you had chosen me to cohost UtH with you was such an honor, one that I'm still unsure that I deserved. I'm sorry I couldn't keep it running, btw. Kaito: Y'know, it occurs to me that we first started talking when I was having issues with someone during PokeNations on the PO server. I'm glad we did, because you're one of the most patient people I've ever met. We don't talk as much anymore, partially because you've got so many post-graduation things to do, but you're seriously awesome. Kiozo: Way back when I first ventured onto the server, you immediately PMed me and started talking to me. You're another enormous sweetheart, with a huge heart to boot. Thanks for letting me talk to you about whatever and offering sound advice; I really do appreciate that about you. Kyoyo: It occurs to me that I've only recently just gotten to actually know you, even though we've spoken for almost a year now. You're one of the coolest guys ever, and the speed of your comebacks is fantastic. I hope to continue to get to know you; you always make me laugh when it counts and I appreciate it. Mikzal: Honestly, I would come to Norway if I could to come see you. Our timezones suck, so we don't get to talk too often, but when we do, it's those casual chats that we have that stick out the most to me. Shadow Roxas: I'm glad we started talking through the assistance of a mutual friend. You're so talented in the web stuff you do for the Treehouse, not to mention the wall papers you've made and your stream. Please keep raging at games; you make me laugh so hard when you do. TheScarletSword: Will he ever see this? Probably not, seeing as he rarely pokes his head in here anymore. However, this scrubby guy is fantastic. Originally, I thought he couldn't stand me because he would hardly talk to me; however, when we did speak, I got to know him as one of the most caring guys ever. Seriously, he is fantastic, and I'm glad to be his friend even if he is a gigantic scrub Sheep: You, my friend, are fantastic. Thank you again for teaching me how to competitive battle; I still remember the words you would tell me when I watch replays of my battles for reflective purposes. You always check on me when I'm just feeling like shit, and remind me that I do in fact matter; I still have that last PM you sent me on here when you told me I'm always needed in some capacity. We need you around here too, and I miss being able to talk to you as often as we used to. Tacos&Flower: Haaaaay fellow valley girl/cheerleading buddy! I'm so glad that you join in on my absolute craziness; having a partner in crime is always fun and you're one of the best. I wish we talked more; though I must thank the friend that dragged you into our Skype group. I've gotten to know you as a fabulously funny and great person. Zephy: My dear Zephy, you are one of the sweetest people ever. We also met in that crazy King of the Hill game, and from there we just kept talking. I love being able to call you my twin; we laugh so often about different things. Plus, you have a blue violin (at least, I think it was blue. Can't really recall...) which is just awesome on its own. Derpy Simon/Stratos: I would love to get to know you both a lot better. Whenever I post a status and am feeling down, you two offer to let me talk or try your hardest to cheer me up. I always see that and it makes me feel a bit better. One of these days I will definitely get to know you both better, because you're both great people. Silver: You are one of the most real people I know here. You never hold back on your opinion, and your bluntness is a breath of fresh air. Whether it's your cooking disasters adventures or falling asleep in a call, you're always able to be lighthearted about things, and I value that about you. Sparky: Now that I've gotten to know you better, I can say without a doubt that you are a very chill person. I love talking WWE with you, as well as friendly battles on the server occasionally. See you for the Money in the Bank watching party Sunday~ Shadow Tack: You are probably one of the people that I talk to the most on the server now days. Whether we're playing ToS, Sm4shing, or even just having a battle in a tier that I know nothing about, we're always guaranteed to have a good time and end up laughing later on. You also show me some pretty awesome music, which is something I always appreciate. EternalEdge: Another person I'm glad I got to know. Admittedly, how loud you can be was intimidating to me at first; however, you're a funny guy with a cute cat. We also love the more classical/Broadway side of music, and I can always count on you to pull through with some sort sly remark or jab that can crack me up easily. Red_Chaos: You're such a cool person. I'm glad I found someone that shares my TV interests so that we can talk while the shows are on (though I haven't watched last night's ANW, so no spoilers please!) Plus, playing ToS with you is always fun; I think trying to get people to join us in main and the advertising we try to pull off is equally as amusing. Kurotsune: We did indeed have a rough start, but you are really awesome. Your morning Skype greetings back when we talked more frequently would made me smile, and I got to learn a lot about you, particularly that you prefer to be a private person. I respect that; I'm also honored that you trusted me enough to tell me some of the things you did