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Mysterious Fox Assassin

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About Mysterious Fox Assassin

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  • Alias
    Riku Sakuraba
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  • Location
    In Dreamland

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  1. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    Family Stuff

    Hey everyone, I'm writing to you all today to share something I've kept hidden. I couldn't really talk about it before because it's hard for others to empathize to this, but it's come to a point where I must share my story with others. Keeping it to myself isn't healthy for me, and it only invites more and more suffering. It's about my "family". My supposed father (who I've come to bitterly hate) is causing me and other members of my family grief. He's selfish, manipulative, vindictive, and everything disgusting you'd see in a person. As a child to a parent, most people would expect for me to just grin and bear it until the situation got better. Well, it didn't. In fact, it got considerably worse. Something in me couldn't take it anymore, and it takes a lot for me to loathe a person to the point of detaching myself, especially if it's someone who you've given a part of your life to. I told him that I didn't consider him to be my father. The way he treated me and my mother was unforgivable. He started going on and on about the past and what he's done for me. Many people would normally say that I should apologize to him, but when you've actually met him, you'd understand why I say those things. All he cares about is taking care of himself. It's never about other people; it must always have a benefit to him in some way. He has made some attempts to reassure his "father" position in my life, but I've shut him out a number of times so that he knows I was serious. He has what I call a "god" complex. He feels as if he can't do any wrong. It's always some other factor or person that did the deed. I've grown to hate him so much the more time he's in the vicinity. This experience has not only been scarring for my mother, but it is also been scarring to me. While I'm not the one whose isn't receiving the brunt of his idiocy, my siblings and I are getting the backlash of it. He can't even take care of the kids who still trust him. Everything is always up to his knowledge and his judgment. Even when my siblings are sick, he doesn't even care for them or give the least bit of concern. If things were up to him, we would have nothing. Because of his god complex, he feels like no one except him deserves the best. I'm just tired. He's the reason why I've changed negatively over the years. When I told my aunt about this, she was surprised that I didn't need therapy after all he's put us through. Anyone with eyes and common sense knows that what he did to me, my mother, and my siblings was wrong. I haven't even told my friends, but my mother's friends know that she's going through with him, and they look at him with scorn and even anger. People often say that they wish they had a father, but in my case, it'd be better if I didn't have one at all. I would've lived a lot better if I didn't know him. The worst part is that he won't leave. He always wants to fit in any space we have in our family, and we constantly have to push him out. He's like a child trapped in a man's body, and those are the people I hate the most. I endlessly hope for the day that I never have to see him again. It's just so hard to live in the same house as him and expect me to not want to be blunt with him. It's not something I take pride in, and it's not something I could tell my real life friends either. The people I know either met him before or worked with him with volunteer work. I've grown so withdrawn from people in general. I just feel so damaged; it's as if like I'm trying to hide my brokenness between a smile and calming demeanor, but really, I want to just break down and cry. I never wanted this; we never wanted any of this. I'm tired of living this double life where I have to be this perfect little angel and this messed-up demon at the same time. It's why I've stayed away from people all this time. Sometimes, I question if I'll ever have a normal relationship with anyone ever again. Who drew up this sick plan where we all have to suffer terrible family situations? I just hope I can keep going after this; this is just too much for me to handle.
  2. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    What is Your Team Building Method?

    My method of teambuilding is covered the previous mons weaknesses. For example, if Infernape is Fire/Fighting, then I'd look for a mon that is Water/Psychic (Slowking in this case). Sometimes, if I do a challenge run, I'll have two physical attackers, two special attackers, and one defensive mon and one special defensive mon. When it comes to competitive though, let's say...monotype, you have to know the ins and outs of the type you're using. You won't always win with a standard core if your type is flexible, but if there is other mons where you can make up a new strategy or tweak the old strategy a bit, then you should test it out and see if it works for you. I hope this helps.
  3. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    The Legend of Riku Sakuraba: Prologue

    Hello everyone, I'm writing a "light" (hopefully) novel that showcases an anti-hero trying to find himself. I won't say much more than that since I'd rather let the story speak for itself. >_> Without further ado, here is the prologue to this story. Hope you all enjoy it! ~MFA aka Sakuraba
  4. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    Emotional Roller Coaster/ Sky-Diving

    Hello everyone, It's truly been a long journey through life, but it doesn't seem like I'm going anywhere fast. I'm dealing with keeping myself from boiling over. I want to throw away all my responsibilities and just wait for death to come, but life's not that easy, I'm afraid. I've been on this emotional roller coaster for a few years now. There are times where I feel like I can take on the world and all of its challenges, and other days, I just...don't. I've been wanting to get off this roller coaster for a while, but it just keeps going. My emotions are all mixed up. Anger becomes sadness; sadness becomes bitterness, and bitterness turns to hatred. Every day feels like another punishment. Sure, there may be times where I laugh, cry, and feel content, but those don't last. I feel too different, and it's not like I can conform to be like everyone else. Everyone seems to find enjoyment in being actual "teenagers" especially seniors at this time of yeah, but I just...don't. It's why I've withdrawn and detached myself from society emotionally. There's times where death would be better than to live life under a kind and happy guise. However, inviting death would only incite more harm than good in my case. My heart and mind is divided into the kind me that wants everyone to go for their dreams and the miserable me who is balled up in a corner, wishing for everything to end. It kind of feels like you're drowning, but everyone can see you breathing just fine on the surface. As I descend deeper into the ocean called life, my mask cracks just a little, and the bitter me shows itself just a little bit. I've learned to cope with it as much as I possibly can to hold back the darkness, but I feel like I've been fighting for way too long. I'm done trying only to be light. I feel trapped and I don't know what to do anymore. It's not like I can tell anyone close to me that I'm feeling this way. They'd probably brush it off and tell me to "cheer up" or "don't be so down in the dumps". I don't expect others to understand the pain I feel anymore. It came with me becoming emotional detached from society. I endlessly wished that I was born with little to no emotions at all. I'm slowly drowning as life's troubles fills my lungs and chokes my sanity. I can only hope that someone can see through the surface and save me from myself...
  5. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    Insert title here

    Dear Luca, There's nothing wrong about not wanting to be made fun of. I struggle with this sometimes. Since I've been bullied for the duration of high school (As to how I survived that, I still couldn't tell you.), I've reached the point where I realized a few things. 1) Humans aren't perfect. We're subject to error. It's those who have a malicious heart to expand upon that failure and use it as a weapon. 2) Jokes directed at a person only add heat to the already boiling water. Everyone's temperature is different; when you meet a person, you gotta know what their background(or temperature in this analogy) is. 3) Most importantly, give yourself some love. Treat yourself in the best way that no one could. I think it's also important to keep your closest friends close. Keeping distance between who's a potential friend and who's not might be helpful. All in all, the message I'm trying to drag across is to be your own best friend. In the end, the only one who can understand you is you. However, if you don't know yourself truly, then how will you be able to love yourself? I'm not saying that you should cut off your friends. Friends are wonderful if they have the similar experiences and personality as you, but it's important to be able to carry your light when you're behind closed doors. Finally, you are a wonderful individual that has such a creative mind. You aren't an ugly potato; you're a beautiful mango.
  6. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    Advice on how to forget someone

    BandorKitty, I'm not much of an expert when it comes to romance, but I've had to cut ties with a lot of "female friends" because the relationship got too awkward. It was hard because of the time and effort I spent on them, but after a while, I had to come to terms with my decision. In your case(gender-flipping here, so forgive me), I believe that it's important that you come to terms with yourself. Being comfortable in your own mind and skin is important because it allows you to see life and love in your "looking glass" so to speak. Give yourself time to breathe, pick up a new hobby, treat yourself, and most importantly, never waver to the will of others. Experience life the way you wish to experience it. You are no longer bound by the will of another. You are you, and that is all that should matter. If you ever need someone to lend an ear, we, the Reborn community, will be happy to do just that.
  7. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    My Own Personal Demons.

    Aegistal, I'm sorry to hear of your struggle with depression. I have (and I am currently) going through a relapse of my depression, but I've never been prescribed medication. The thing about antidepressants(or any advertised medicines you see on t.v.) is that it introduces tons of side-effects for the hope that a person's mood will be boosted. In my opinion and from the description of the medicine's effect on you, it doesn't seem like it is helping at all. The best medicine for depression is to talk to someone you genuinely trust, and this person must be respectful of you as well. It won't do you any good to find a person who brushes off depression. Whether it be here in the forums or somewhere in real life, talking to someone will be the best remedy for depression. I would also advocate lots of self-care or treating yourself whenever you can. I think it's best that we reward ourselves even for the small victories. The road to recovery is long and hard, but I, as well as others in the Reborn community, will be happy to have your back whenever you need us. Please don't be afraid to talk to us, and we'll do our best to offer as much support as we possibly can.
  8. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    S3 Redemption Restart Thread

    Electric didn't pan out as I would've liked so here's this one.
  9. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    S3 Redemption Restart Thread

    Since one of my favorite's is in my hands now, it's time for me to try and take this league by storm~ Dear Mega Ampharos, I wish to bring you back soon... R.I.P. Luciano 2k18
  10. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    USUM Updates

    Ah oops; let me fix that real quick I'll keep my old moveset; if I desperately need Tailwind, I'll use my one move token
  11. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    USUM Updates

    Since USUM came along, I think I'll make a few changes myself.
  12. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    Mythos League Restart Thread

    Note to self: never trust people who give you their teams because you have no idea who to work them haha! Anyways, here's the new (and hopefully final) gen 7 team I'll use for Mythos. If you hate me for restarting, too bad
  13. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    S3 Redemption Restart Thread

    I'm quite tired of my old team because of little to no synergy so I'm trying this one this time around.... Cross me, and I'll end you.
  14. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    Mythos League Restart Thread

    No more gimmicks yay! Here's the new team presented by a special someone. For my sprite, I'd like this one please.
  15. Mysterious Fox Assassin

    S3 Redemption Restart Thread

    After some 4 days of deliberation, I've decided its best to start this over with my new team. For my sprite, I'd like this please with the name Shiki with the same template...
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