Q-Jei
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Sometimes, I would like to fry all these intrusive energy vampires that are hanging on me, see them decompose and turn them into f**king ash piles! For those who don't get my point, I'm talking about this type of vampire in particular:
https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/energy-vampires
Now let me get one thing straight. I just can't stand to be monopolized anymore, my body and my brain are not free batteries for everyone. If I don't say no and can't take a big break, I collapse and I become despisable for the others and myself. Sadly, this opportunity to let it go has not shown up for 6 months as I never was allowed to take one single day off during my internship, and it slowly turns me into the type of person that I fear the most. Also, it would be a mistake from me to not mention the fact that I'm working overtime with one extra hour each day, which impacts my mood a lot. All this to say that I need vacation at all cost as well as a lot of peace! This is my last hope to embrace the sense of the word "positivity" again!
PS: Sorry for those who will find themselves in this paragraph, but this had to be written someday. Malaise is better off in the words of a large text than in the head of the person affected by it.
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I read that article and I was like “Wow, I think I can relate to some of the stuff that was said.” Then I look at what I used to do in my free time such as blogging, mobile apps (Duel Links, Bloons TD 6, etc.) and YouTube and wondering why I suddenly stopped doing the things that I used to enjoy doing. I think I was working overtime as well, so most of the energy has been drained from me and wanted to go to bed. On days that I rarely have energy, I’m on the computer working on some fan game project in RPG Maker. I think that one day, I might not have to experience stressful days anymore, but only time will tell.
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This is exactly what I've been through since the beginning of 2021! But I didn't feel right to talk about this again this week cause I finally managed to get things done with my internship last Friday and I successfully sent my report to my school. It's as if something inside of me was rebuilt as time went by. I feel less tired but I still have my oral presentation to prepare. When everything will be over with my student life, it will surely be the end of a big book full of life experiences and memories about relentless efforts.
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