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Hi, Um...


Chase

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Huh....well you learn something new everyday. Regardless of anyone's opinion, my own included, this is if anything an interesting occurrence and I hope that you reach its best outcome :D

Edited by DJWongTong
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Oh. It's THIS whole song and dance again. Is it just me or is reborn becoming a tumblr-style confession site or something.

Hiding behind false aliases is never something I approve of, especially if you're using the identity of a real person who has no clue what the HELL is going on. But then again I don't really have a right to be mad, buut it's still exceedingly not cool. Hell if I was more awake, I'd basically echo everything Winter said before his post gets/was deleted. I saved that post by the way so if it does get wiped and anyone wants to read it, shoot me a PM.

At this rate, I'm just asking who the hell's going to do it next. It's unhealthy to keep a big fat lie simmering, so why don't we all confess to the dirty little lies we all keep.

I'll start even! 20 year old gay guy who likes dragons and traveling! don't believe me? I can throw a picture of both me and ame, and if that ain't proof enough, I don't know what is.

how had was that to actually tell the truth. and on that note, i'm just going to leave my soy sauce on simmer and listen to other peoples boil.

Edited by Noivy
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I don't even know why they're showing support for you on this issue at all.

I believe, like you said, it's because people don't really know the full extent of the consequences of his actions.

The bitterness isn't simply because of he was a guy impersonating a girl, but because of said guise, he ended up hurting people and lying.

I know i shouldn't have much word on this since i keep a low profile on here, but i'm a somewhat average-long time member by now, but people need to understand what this all entails.

On a personal note, what baffled me the most about all this was the complete lack of consideration concerning other's feelings. You toyed with them Hunter. You knew perfectly what would happen if you kept this all up, but you insisted anyways. You're smart, i know you did know. If you do X, Y happens because you did X.

You had an alias to present online, that's fine, some people do that, but you prefered to keep it up even when you knew it would bring of harm to others.

Maybe you thought you were living in some sort of fantasy world where other people are kinda like 'NPC' and they didn't really matter, but they do.

The internet is a virtual space, but the people are very real, and should be treated as such. You were completely cold, ruthless (you seem to think that's a good thing, it's not.) and really low on the empathy department.

You screwed up.

That being said, again on a personal note, i can forgive you, but that doesn't mean other people should/can.

You have to face consequence because of your wrongdoings, whatever that consequence is.

As for people, forgiveness and mercy are traits i hold in high regard, but before sending said forgiveness and support, everything must be taken into account. This is big.

I hope you somehow manage to clean this up Hunter, but quite frankly, you're gonna need a big broom.

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I decided to wait until I've slept on all this before responding, since if I would have said something last night I probably would have regretted it. However, now that I've slept I think I'm ready to reply.

Hilda and I didn't always see eye to eye, and I don't see that changing with you Hunter, since it seems apparent that personality-wise you two were pretty much the same person. I don't even need you to admit that like you seemed to a few times, just the way you type and word things tells me enough to know that. That's fine honestly. I want people in this community who don't see eye to eye with me. It's what inspires growth and change. That's why I'm neutral towards you keeping auth or not. It's something that should be decided between the auth themselves, and is not a thing for everyone else to decide.

Being male or female doesn't effect my opinion of you very much at all honestly.

What had me absolutely livid though is the fact that you hurt people that I care a lot about; that I love. I had a talk with you when I found out Hilda and Ame were together, and I meant it. I can't forgive someone who hurts Ame, even if she acts like she's doing alright. The fact of the matter is that this whole charade went on for way too long and cut in way too deep. That being said I agree that you can still redeem yourself just not completely, not to me. I can still be civil around you, and I'll still treat you like I would anyone else but there'll always be a part of me that remembers the pain you've caused to the people Hilda grew close to.

Do you deserve the slander some people are giving you? Probably not. Do you deserve the praise people are giving you for something they call brave? Probably not. Do you deserve a chance to rebuild? I think everyone deserves a chance, regardless of what I feel about them or what they've done.

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Ok, so I'm just going to speak my mind once again. To preface this, I read the OP horribly wrong and jumped to the conclusion that this was a post about Hilda coming out as transgender and based my reaction solely upon that. Now that I realize, I'm pitching in my own thoughts.

Everyone tells a little white lie. It's human nature. We are people, we are flawed. I myself, am a pathological liar. I see things turning bad for me, and I build up a wall of lies as a shelter and spend my time inside finding a way to escape without harming myself or those around me. Lies will happen, and I understand that. But there are things that are just unacceptable, and I find this to be an example. The alias I can understand. This is the internet, you can't trust everyone on who they say they are. But this is the equivalent of a catfish. Using pictures of someone else and portraying them to be you, regardless of your affiliation, is unacceptable. As I said, this is the internet, you have no clue how much danger you're putting them in by exposing them to places they wouldn't on their own. You have no clue who lies behind the screen, and you better hope there's not some sicko behind the screen here who's ready to pounce on that poor girl.

And to forge relationships with so many people here under the alias of that girl? To involve yourself in a loving relationship, that I have to believe was one-sided, under this alias is despicable. I find it hard to believe that you had any feelings for Ame if you pursued her under this alias. How long were you expecting to keep this up? Until you two eventually broke up for other reasons? Until you two were to meet face to face? You knew you were getting yourself in too deep, and yet you dug your hole deeper. You took those bonds you formed, hooked them deeper under peoples' skin, and then tore them out when the facade was compromised. I hope you at least considered the possibility of abandoning the alias, or abandoning these people for the better of both sides, because the only way this could have been worse would have been for you to continue on. There was no way to escape this without pain, and I think the moment you began to create a bond with any one person here, you knew it.

Now, I never was too close with you. Our relationship was strictly one of co-workers when I was an auth. I tried to cooperate politely as I would with anyone else who was staff, even if it did feel like that polite cooperation wasn't reciprocated. I never made a bond with you like I have others in Reborn, so my forgiveness will come easier than others. I don't condone your actions, but I am always willing to give second chances. But those second chances are to be earned.

I imagine trust like a Jenga tower. You take a block from the bottom with each lie you tell, and each bond your form under this lie, and place it on top to make it taller, to better yourself. But with each lie, the tower becomes less structurally sound, until it eventually topples, and you're forced to build it back from the bottom. And I'm aware my opinion is less valuable now that I no longer have my title, but I believe you should be starting back from the bottom. In my opinion, lost trust is not significant enough of a punishment. Each time this tower topples, it gets more tedious to rebuild. So I hope this is the last big lie we'll hear from you, because I don't give out third chances in most circumstances.

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Oh. Well. I wasn't expecting that at all.

I can't say we know each other well enough that I feel there's a whole lot for me to forgive. I think your issues are with others, and I won't presume to know enough about those issues to offer my commentary. I certainly do know what it's like to play the whole "conceal, don't feel" game, though, so I'm glad you can move beyond that.

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Well then...erm Hunter. It's definitely eye-opening to say in the very least. But time and time again, Reborn has consistently proven to be a liberal and accepting community as it is. And after discovering things about Amethyst, amongst other people on here, announcements like this just don't shock me as much anymore.

Still though, whatever the heck floats your boat Hunt. Just roll with it. I'll make ya kinky on the server no matter what your gender.

Edit: does this mean you'll be a different person because of this? I'm not sure if you'd put up a new persona because of this.

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Hi Hunter, formerly Hilda. I'm Dobby The Elf. Nice to meet you. Welcome to Reborn Hunter, please leave your sanity at the door.

Note to self: Update your profile in Ymora.

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So, Ima expand slightly upon my feelings

For me to deal with this emotionally I'm going to treat Hunter and Hildra as separate entities (kinda similar to how I deal with my gender and other identity issues) To me, Hildra was a close friend who I trusted with some very personal information and who ended up being a liar. Needless to say I'm extremely angry with Hildra and will never forgive her for betraying my trust. However, Hunter is someone new who carries neither the feelings of distrust and anger nor the respect and friendship Hildra had, so I'm willing to allow him a chance

I'm going to miss Hildra, because she was a close friend, even if she did hurt me in the end. I'm not really angry (and I don't think being angry is going to help anything) more just sad

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As a personal note, while I do appreciate the concern for me that some have voiced, I don't want that care to turn into animosity. That won't help anything-- and honestly, this all meant a lot to me, but I'm okay. And I'll continue to be. So no need to worry about me. ^~^

But I think this thread has served its intended purpose. For the sake of not letting create continual argument, conflict, or more disdain than is natural, I'm going to go ahead and lock it.

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