Cry as much as you need and for as long as you need to, its a release, your bodies way of releasing emotions.
I don't have any experience in what you are personally going through, but I am battling depression and anxiety myself, any time of day or night you need to vent, rant, cry, or just get stuff off your chest, PM me.
Please don't struggle on your own, seek help, if you are to scared to seek out the police your local doctors surgery can do it all, and keep you out of it all, they will also do everything within their power to help, including someone to talk to, or any other route necessary.
Please, please, don't feel like you have to go through it alone