This one is going to be pretty personal, because I have to blow off some steam somehow somewhere. Sorry in advance.
Good:
I have to be optimistic for this, each passing years gets worse.
- I have made the decision to move out of my father's house to be more independant in life and because there has been a lot of tension since a few years.
- I wish to study media design because it seems like the right choice for me.
- Finally finished the most important part of the concept for my fangame and I am finally able to continue working on it. Now I know it will be released in the far future of a thousand years^^
Bad:
- Wished to search for some new friends this year, still an extremely lonely person now. For a while I was content with being happy, but I believe that being truly lonely is one of the worst things that can happen to a person because it feels like a slow death.
- Stopped to care about a lot of things because of above I guess.
- I wish to leave my social circle behind and start anew, but I don't know how. I have lost most of my social skills.
- Heavy mood swings. Sometimes, I am happy and I can let these trivial things of life distract me. Other times I literally cry myself to sleep.
- Very little sleep.
- Attempted to drown my frustration with alcohol, showed up drunk in school once. It is no solution, I know.
- This month I had my 20th birthday and there was christmas. I couldn't care less about either and it makes me feel even worse. I wished for nothing this year, got some money and some other stuff. Materialistic wishes don't make truly happy, they never do. Gave my father a present though, but that doesn't make me feel good because I wanna and I am gonna move out 2016.
- I feel like being an ass towards those who treat me worse than others compared to being my normaö peaceful self.
- Maybe I am slowly descending towards madness or something :/