UrbanSamurai

"....." It's good to see these kinds of things at a distance. You get to see it with...objectivity. Yeah, that's it. The artillery shelling of a village on an island. Dropping a firebomb on a civilian factory. A waitress being stabbed to death in front of her apartment complex. The motherfucker just keeps jabbing and jabbing and jabbing and his butterfly knife is just putting all these gashes in her and her dress is turning red and she's screaming and crying. And he doesn't stop because he's pissed but you don't know if he's pissed because he actually hates her or he hates his job

The BOOMTOWN EXPRESS rumbles towards the general epicenter of everyone left standing. Magnum leaned out the window, looking around the ruined countryside like a tourist trying to decipher the value behind an esoteric burial site. "And can you believe that my wife always wanted to go to France? This place is a real dump! That's why Edward DeGaul left France to play for the Colts. He revolutionized the position of kicker, nobody before him ever kicked barefoot! And not too many either, especially when they started using weighted balls that ended up with a lot of broken toes. But those few years

Press pulls out something that resembles a small pistol from inside of his jacket pocket. With a flick of a switch, its barrel crackles with volatile electricity. Press Tases Officer A, doing 1d10 + 10 (+14) DMG, with a 10% chance to stun.

BOOMTOWN Magnum Use Hustle Play on Soryn to grant an extra turn.

"Yee-ouch! That was fuckin' lightning! Isn't that square supposed to be on our side?" "It didn't hurt at all, that must have been his way of prepping us up." "You know what Press? You're right, I feel like I'm on a winning streak at the craps game. Let's go like the 20's!" Rampart activates Jungle Sniper, where Press will use his Scoped Rifle to blast at Bel Lahmu B, Bel Lahmu A and Officer A for 1d10+(10) (+14 Damage)!

BOOMTOWN Magnum Give Soryn an extra action with Hustle Play.

Name: Faznie Kotvar Age: 28 Gender: Female Appearance: Pallid flesh and brown eyes concealed by a "Locos de Muertos" hoodie and torn leggings (the damage is from fashion, not from wear). Between Faznie's contrasting pale skin, dark clothing and roundish form, she might resemble a panda bear. Accessories include a bear of BEATZ headphones usually around her neck and a bulging purple messenger back stylized with doodles and pins of various films and bands. Background: Faznie's parents met during the turbulent Prague Spring, which Faznie claims "should be recognized as the mo

Rampart "Looks like we have some feisty civilians on our hands." "Civilians? This looks like a riot. Nah, this an armed revolt! We're going to need more than sidearms for this gig. What do you suggest Prez?" "Bigger guns. A show of force before any real violence goes down." "You know what Prez? You can be brilliant sometimes." Rampart Lock N' Loads, fishing out heavier weaponry from the trunk of their Cadillac. [Increases Strength (6) by Intelligence (4) for 2 Turns. CD: 2] [Passives: Synergistic Justice - All Perks last for an additional

Magnum relays the information to his teammates. "She's a few white dresses and flower petals short of being a bona-fide virgin knight, that I can tell you. If we look at the tape on her, she does not have a gameplan for divine intervention, and gets roasted defensively when someone turns up the oven. It's going to be a long day for her if her strategic holes get exploited." Give Spicy an extra action next turn with Hustle Play.

"Joining you live from what could pass for Kansas City, this is Rich BOOOOOOOOMTOWN Magnum. Let's look at the opposing lineup." Telestrate Saber. [Magnum chooses an Opposing Target 1d20+INT VS. 1d20+Opp.INT. If Magnum is successful, he figures out a Weakness of the target, reveals one of its Perks/Abilities, or gets a hint to help optimize his Team's performance.. (Ex., if the Target is doing X, respond with a Y-type maneuver.) Once a Strategy is successfully discovered, anyone implementing the Strategy in their actions gets an overall +5 to that action.]

Press walks over to one fallen soldier laying on its backside back. He squats down, looking over the body curiously and grabbing it by the wrist, rotating the muscle around. "Time of death within the past thirty minutes. Method is questionable, I'm seeing burn marks but also lacerations. Clothing is also in the way." Press looks back up at the many, many other bodies littering the battlefield. "Autopsy will be delayed due to circumstances." "It's a damn shame these dumb bastards didn't stay in school instead of making this mess. Shoot, the funeral homes in this place must be loaded

Rampart's came around to their delayed introduction as Press finished sketching his new surroundings while Lucky kept trying to strike a stubborn match. "Sonova'..." Magna's inquiry takes Press's eyes off of his beloved notebook long enough to think of an answer, "Detective Prezbuluski - We're the Curbstomp Detatchment, R-21. Central is having us link up with your detachment to make a proper Division." Press squints at Magna in the same way an explorer looks at an odd indent in an otherwise plain wall deep within a ruins. He resumes sketching. Lucky takes a hit of the S

As radiance and kinetic energy smite and rebound across the battlefield, Magnum shovels handfuls of Cracker Jack into his gullet. "I never get tired of this stuff you know," he says wiping molasses coated caramel off of the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand. "They say it was the first junk food ever invented, and could've been the last! Perfect for every event: football game, parade, 4th of July, coronation, or just going out to the movies. Hey bus, do we got any more of this stuff?" Magnum enthusiastically rattles the nearly empty bag. "Darlin'...I'd redirect your atte

Magnum Rams Cu with the BOOMTOWN EXPRESS.

Magnum yells into the speakers, "We need to close off all avenues for escape! I want every flank covered, our whole line is going to push forward into his pocket! He can't block everyone! Morale is low! Bludgeon bludgeon bludgeon!" Blitzkreig on Cu.