GreyRavensong

Sigh. For all the love I have for rejuvenation (a lot otherwise I wouldn’t be here) I HATE v14s endings. Killing off the player no matter what you do in BOTH routes is definitely a choice I guess… hopefully I get to play as myself again at SOME point. Unless there’s some way to avoid getting killed in paragon and avoid getting taken over by zenos in renegade then hey maybe I’m stupid. But I really dislike that both zenos and kaina came out of basically nowhere only to kill the player basically. I mean hey sure Zenos go ahead take all my pokemon…. And Sure Kaina who’s actually been madame x sometimes and otherwise hasn’t been hinted at being important otherwise (to my knowledge at least) sure go ahead and kill me or or better yet just make me sit there and have my friends hate me and then DIE. The paragon endings for v14 are not ones I’m fond of (spending the last day with Nancy is the sole exception) and even then it’s tainted by the fact that you can’t do ANYTHING with the invite from variya hell it’s not even an item. I know nobody gonna read this (I just posted something similar on Reddit hoping at least someone feels the same) but for the immense amount of love I have for this game, I feel cheated by the endings this time around. Maybe I’m just sick of tragedies, or maybe I’ve got more narcissistic traits than I thought (which was none)  also killing amber AND Alain my two favs is truly evil! Maybe I was hoping to have a chance in at least one world not to get fucked over completely. Even if it’s only a fictional story. But I really should know better no matter which version of me real or otherwise I am horrendously unlucky and will suffer for no reason other than because I can. I appreciate all the work that went into this game and the work that will continue to go into it, hell sad as it is the characters in rejuv really are the closest thing I have to friends these days. The presentation across the board from music to artwork was glorious. I’m just having a hard time coping with the fact that once again the story that should have been mine has been ripped away and given to another. 
 

Sorry if any of the devs read this I really hope this doesn’t come off as hostile, it’s more grief I guess I feel like I’m mourning a part of my life I felt like was important. Hell Alain’s old sprite is responsible for me beginning to question my gender back in the day.  So in a small way the game and its characters mean a lot y’know and that included other me, both paragon and renegade. Virtue and vice, there’s parts of my personality I see reflected back at me through them. Or I did… now I may as well be blind. I suppose they meant it when they said progressing further meant it was the end… 

Happy birthday to me.

Happy pride month

Oh yea, still alive. 
 

sigh. 

Hi. 
 

ok bye.

Pokemon champions is kinda lame ngl. Gacha mechanics to get Pokemon sucks. I don’t have home or any of the switch games anymore. Had to sell them to eat lunch a few weeks back. So I’m at a huge disadvantage, definitely doesn’t help that I never played any of the new games since bdsp or legends arceus. Gen 9 sucks ngl I really dislike every single Pokemon design and the power creep is too much. Glad darkrai got something but damn it is UGLY and SLOW?! Why would they make darkrai slow. Absol z is cool. Garchomp z being a special attacker is really dumb tho. Official Pokemon has just kinda sucked for a while now I guess. At least in champions they don’t aggressively gender me. Legend arceus made me so sad with that. Course I highly doubt Pokemon will ever be what I want it to be. (But damn who is adding an enby option hurting? And can we please chose our age or something I’m not a kid anymore and honestly seems like most people playing Pokemon aren’t either) sigh. Sorry for the barely coherent rant this morning. Just bored and tired and sad.

Bored. Very very bored.

So, just finished my 2nd run of DAV and I’m pretty sure I made the exact same choices the whole way through again lol. Still made me cry tho. Rip davrin. 
hurts way more as a fellow warden I swear.

Soooooooo. I am still alive. 
 

that is all 

So finally got around to doing a renegade run on rejuv. Lots of thoughts. All the ones regarding the game are good. The ones regarding my irl personality’s similarities to a strange hybrid of m2 and the interceptor as they appear in that route. Less good. But if I know ANYTHING it’s that I have a real nasty self loathing problem. And cannot exactly be trusted to have an honest view of myself.  Least I’m more honest about that than m2 will ever be. Heh.

that final monologue from the interceptor tho… felt a little to close to shit id actually say in that position. Kinda freaky ngl. But I digress. Cya

I have Been playing Nioh 3 for 7 and a half hours. I fucking love this game.

that is all.

buy Nioh!

Hi.

it needs to be Feb 6th already. I NEED MY NIOH 3!!!! There’s nothing left in the demo for me ughhh and I already completed code vein 2. Why do so few games come out that are interesting

Oh yea. Right. Sorry. 
im still alive.

Happy holidays. 
that’s it, not feelin particularly talkative tonight.

Spotify wrapped for the year