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Cloneworks Unlimited First Quest: Lifetime Achievement Award


Hal Henderics

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You remember Darkness.  Maddening, twisting Darkness, the sort of shadows that creep into the edges of every corner and won't let go.

You are undeniably mad, and then... You're nothing at all.

 

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: Purging Foreign Influence
: Detaching Nutrivat™ Cables
: Preparing Clone
: T̡̧ȩ̕s̶͘t͘͠F҉̧a̵͜i̛͝ĺ̵͡ų͠r̨͘͡ȩ̴̶C͞҉h͟e̵͡c͏̴͠k̴͢͝E҉͞͠r̷͜͞r̡͝o͠͝҉̵r͢͠H̷a̴̢̡ǹ̕͝ḑ̸͟l҉̛͝é͟҉r̕ :
: Existing . . .
: You may now Exist. - Thank you for using Nutrivat™

 

--

 

 

You awaken on a cot in a dark, metallic room.  Looking yourself over, you notice that you are a human, wearing a beige jumpsuit, with a large, golden sphere embedded in your chest.

The sphere is covered in mysterious runes and etchings that seem to serve no purpose other than aesthetic.  Small vents on the sphere emit a faint light.

 

There is only one door leading out of the room, and several other cots each holding people that look identical to you...
 

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New Main Quest!

Dude, Where's My Clone?
Where the hell are you? What the hell is going on? Who the hell are these people? What the hell?!

Reward: None

 

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I...exist?

 

And then I see another fall to the floor and block it? 

 

Well I calmly get up from my bed and see how the others were doing. Waving a hand in front of their faces a few times as a method to check if they were awake. Getting bored, I went to peek my head out of the door to see what was outside. 

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A bald man (just one of many, here) awoke with a start, jumpsuit ruffling as he abruptly sat up, squinting somewhat blankly at the wall near him. "What?" He looked around, squint still stuck on his face, and noticed the presence of many other people that all looked the same -- wait, did he look the same? "Huh??" He looked down and spotted the strange golden sphere in his chest, and poked at it with an expression of raw confusion. "What in the world is going on?" His face settled into an expression of utter, complete bafflement; really, how was he supposed to respond to, uh... what was... how was he supposed to respond to suddenly existing and all that came with it, he supposed?

 

The presence of other people was reinforced by one of the other bald jumpsuited men rolling out of his cot with a rustle and a thump, falling... actually not face-first onto the ground, but on his arms. Scratching the side of his face with a still rather-bemused expression, the bald man stepped out of his cot (not falling out of it in the same way). "Uh, yeah, hey, what? Do, uh-- do you know, uh... what? Do you know what? I mean, in general, just... what everything. Do you-- what the hell is everything?" He frowned -- he couldn't quite get a grasp on what he wanted to say. He tried one more valiant time, putting his everything into trying to express and comprehend the depths of his bafflement. "Bllwaauueughhhhh."

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Slowly sliding back into existence, one of the clones lets out a, "Blub," before he(?) tries to slide off the bed, their arms quickly snapping up to shield his face before he gracefully deposited themself into a crumpled up pile on the floor. "Bllwaauueughhhhh," they replied, before they gingerly stood up for long enough to sit their ass down on the cot again.

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One of the clones unceremoniously flops to the ground out of their pod, and seems to be dead for a moment before groaning and rolling over. "I don't know what's going on but I don't think I like it already." They glance over towards the rest, who are variously flailing and yelling. "And you're all noisy." The clone thinks for a moment. "Is that a bad thing?"

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The clone who initiated the forced and confused wailing noise fell silent after a short "Blrwah," looking down at the floor for a long moment, before closing his eyes and lapsing into a deep, almost meditative contemplation. Finally, he looked up, and opened his eyes serenely. "I am confused," he stated. Then he closed his eyes once more, taking on a thoroughly reverential air. "I..." the clone declared, "have acquired words." This knowledge would take him far, he was sure. With this newly discovered ability, the clone turned calmly over to the clone loudly and violently thrashing all over the floor and let out a "hmwah," sound of quiet contemplation.

 

"You are twitching around on the floor," the clone declared, in a monotone voice.

 

The speech of another one of his clones then drew his attention. "I have been acquiring words," he stated in simply reply.

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"Don't you already have words?" The clone waves their arm a bit in a desultory fashion, before. . . doing something that kind of resembles what the other clone was doing for a moment in an attempt to stand up. "I also don't like that," they declare, before standing up in a more normal fashion. "What's going on here, anyway? Why do I suddenly exist and why didn't I exist before?"

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As several of you go through the door, and walk out into the dismal hallway, you are startled when a crazed old man drops down from the ceiling behind you, grinning a toothless grin and waving around a wooden stick.

 

"You're finally awake.  Looks like those old vats were working good after all!  I'm Scantankerous Tim, pleased for to meet you." he bows, chuckling to himself.

"Now I's know why you all confused, 'Why'd old Scant wake me up and all that?' well boy howdy let me tell you, it sure is a good thing you ain't crazed, there's already one too many crazy people in this old place!" he shouts.

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I open my eyes and stare at the ceiling, letting the existential questions wash over me.  Why am I here?  What is this place?  What am I?  But then, it hits me.  While it would be nice to know these answers, I know what is most important.

 

"I am here!"  Everything else can wait.

 

I stand up.  It takes a few tries to steady myself, but it's not so hard.  "This place is strange!  I am unsettled by this place.  I would like to leave this place.  Would you like to come with me?"  I check the door, to see if I can leave this place.

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2 minutes ago, Hal Henderics said:

As several of you go through the door, and walk out into the dismal hallway, you are startled when a crazed old man drops down from the ceiling behind you, grinning a toothless grin and waving around a wooden stick.

 

"You're finally awake.  Looks like those old vats were working good after all!  I'm Scantankerous Tim, pleased for to meet you." he bows, chuckling to himself.

"Now I's know why you all confused, 'Why'd old Scant wake me up and all that?' well boy howdy let me tell you, it sure is a good thing you ain't crazed, there's already one too many crazy people in this old place!" he shouts.
 

I wave. "Hello Scant. Are we supposed to be crazy?"

Edited by Barkhasia
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"I was using words, but I was not..." the clone fell silent, once again contemplating the way of words, and after a few more moments of frankly rather awkward silence he spoke up again, now actually speaking with proper inflection and emphasis instead of just in a monotone manner. "I had not been using words, just letting them out without any contemplation of what they were. I had not really acquired the words, in other words, I was just using them. But now I am acquiring the usage of words, and now the usage of emphasis -- I am better able to communicate my meaning through the usage of the words that leave my mouth." He nodded, satisfied with that explanation. "Now, I believe that I am sufficiently satisfied with the methods of speaking that I am in possession of, and we can exit this room. I am ready to do so, at least, please follow me if you are as well."

And in that moment, bam, toothless old man with a stick. Immediately, the nameless clone utilized the breadth of his techniques. First, he shouted loudly: "Aauaauauuuh!!!" He was expressing his surprise, for the old man had in fact startled him and it had not been pleasant. Then, he immediately switched to speaking as calmly as a still pool. "Hello there, Scantankerous Tim, I... actually do not have a name, it would appear. But I confess that I find myself perplexed by this whole situation, and I believe that we," and here came a bit of emotion in his voice, "all are terribly confused by this whole ordeal of... suddenly existing and acquiring basic techniques. Would you mind providing us with some explanation?"

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One of the dudes on a cot wakes up and rolls off, crashing into the floor before pulling himself up.
He looks around for a bit in confusion before his half awake self started looking around

Look for some kind of coin, charm, trinket, or seemingly useless item. Perhaps it will help me come to terms with existing in reality.
Existing is weird 

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(6, 4) Blaze's dude finds a large rock, shaped like a rectangle.

(16, 19) Froggy's dude finds that there is nothing but solid rock outside of these walls immediately surrounding him, where there isn't other rooms, that is.

--

Scantankerous Tim scratches his chin.

"Supposed to be?  I don't know about that, but you coulda been coocoo, and that wouldn'ta been good for old Scanty!"

"I had the old cloop-chute poop you fellas out and drug you over where a fella could rest.  Kinda needed a few fellers what could get us outta here fore Skrankercobbler eats this whole place up!"


He leans in with a mad gleam.  "Ol' Sprayberbobblehead's a right mean grump, rootin' around, eatin' everything up.  He'll kill us all, soon as he gets up here."

"Course, can't rightly get out without my still.  We really won't live without some hooch!  That's where you boys come in,"
he says.

 

"Get my still fore' the Stankerjoggler gets us, and I'll show you the way out."

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8 minutes ago, Hal Henderics said:

(6, 4) Blaze's dude finds a large rock, shaped like a rectangle.

(16, 19) Froggy's dude finds that there is nothing but solid rock outside of these walls immediately surrounding him, where there isn't other rooms, that is.

--

Scantankerous Tim scratches his chin.

"Supposed to be?  I don't know about that, but you coulda been coocoo, and that wouldn'ta been good for old Scanty!"

"I had the old cloop-chute poop you fellas out and drug you over where a fella could rest.  Kinda needed a few fellers what could get us outta here fore Skrankercobbler eats this whole place up!"


He leans in with a mad gleam.  "Ol' Sprayberbobblehead's a right mean grump, rootin' around, eatin' everything up.  He'll kill us all, soon as he gets up here."

"Course, can't rightly get out without my still.  We really won't live without some hooch!  That's where you boys come in,"
he says.

 

"Get my still fore' the Stankerjoggler gets us, and I'll show you the way out."

“Where’s your still? We’ll cart it out.”

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The clone tilted their head at the one with the fancy words's reaction to the strange man appearing. That seemed rather. . . odd. Not that this clone had much of a frame of reference. Disregarding that, though, there was another subject to be considered.

 

"So how exactly does hooch help us live?" They also didn't know what hooch was, but no need to let that on. "And who's. . . Stinkdoubler?

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The socially-inclined clone looked gravely at Scantankerous Tim, and then closed his eyes and nodded, putting a hand sympathetically on the man's shoulder. "I understand what you are saying, sir. Do not worry; we will help you retrieve your still, I understand that you must be very concerned." At this point, he turned towards the others and began to speak to them. "Scantankerous Tim here has been pursued by a creature known as the Scantgobbler, which he merely has been mispronouncing due to his understandable fear of the monster. It seems to have a specific sort of malice aimed at him, and it accordingly is likely guarding his still in order to lure him back and eat him once he gets there. Accordingly, as we ought to retrieve Tim's still, we will need to have some manner of dealing with this creature, whether it be combat, diplomacy, or perhaps some way of bypassing it entirely."

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The clone with the very bruised arms turns to look at the talky clone for a moment, his eyes scanning up and down their form as he thought long and hard about something."Have no fear, if Gobbler hits I will block," he finally said, nodding sagely while he did so with a self satisfied expression on his face, as if he had just shared some comforting piece of wisdom...

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Seeing Scant’s distress about this Scantgobbler, I will try to send out my chi like a sensory pulse for anything living other than us clones and Scant. Hoping that this use of my energy to sense out biological organisms would work.

Edited by Barkhasia
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"I suppose then, we shall need your still.  I swear, we shall recover it safely for you," I promise Scant, "Now where could it have go- oh god," I turn just in time to see one of my compatriots eat the metal orb right out of their stomach.  "What- I- How did you do that?!  Why would you do that?!

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