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CodeCass

Struggeling Today...

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Outside of my wife, I don't really have many folks I bare my soul to. I thought maybe making a post here might help a bit. I view a lot of  you as friends nowadays and I spend just as much time here it feels like than I do other sites.

 

Let me preface this with something as well. I just started a strong steroid medication to help get over a poison ivy outbreak, and there's a fairly good chance that this is what's causing my emotional upheaval today. Still, I've always thought talking through things helps versus keeping it bottled up.

 

Today has just felt like a horrid day. I've been anxious, shaky, depressed, jumpy, and just over all down. I've tried my best to put on a happy face while at work, but it's exhausting me today. I haven't felt like this since I was a teen. I don't get like this any more as an adult. All seemed fine until about 9am this morning. I was hit by this sudden, crushing feeling of dread. It was enough that I texted my wife and asked if there was something I should be upset about that I didn't remember. The best way I can describe it is: think about the time you've been in the worst trouble, or received just terrible news. That crushing feeling, that pit in your stomach opening feeling. The cold sweat and dizzy feeling. That's what I felt. 

 

Of course she assured me she was fine, we were fine, and everything in general was fine. Was going to be hotter than hell outside today, but it's been that way all week, so that's no big shocker. Otherwise, everything's good. After work she's suggested us going to grab an ice cream and maybe hit the park and play a little Pokémon Go, maybe take some gyms back and show these kids around here how to play Pokémon, haha. 

 

My issue is, every since then, I've been struggling to keep it together. I feel like I'm having to claw my way out of some dark pit today. I feel just completely mentally exhausted. I have no idea what's caused this. I know it all has to be in my head. I know it must be the meds or something. But that doesn't change how I'm feeling. Alone, depressed, worried, worthless. 

 

I'm hoping this passes soon. I'm not normally like this.

 

 

I didn't mean to come into the Reborn world and rant about a bad day. I just...needed to spell it out. You all have helped me a lot over the past couple months that I've been back. Not just from your direct interactions with me personally, but just by being such a supportive community. I enjoy reading the posts and lurking around the site off and on all day. Just checking in to see what you all are up to, or what new memes or music you all are posting. For a site about game about a dark and depressing Pokémon world, you all do wonders to lift my spirits daily. 

 

 

So thanks for letting me...spill my guts, I guess? Haha. I hope everyone here can have a good day. You all are great folks in your own ways. Thanks again for everything. 

 

 

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Es ok fam, this subforum exists for y'all to spell bad days or problemo sin general. Everyone has moments of weakness.

I also think it might be the meds. I've seen how hormonal meds can alter a person's mood, though I've never experienced it myself (well outside being a woman with monthly mood swings lel)

In my opinion i think frens online or irl are valuable. I actually spend most of my day in and out on Discord, and I regard my frens here with as much esteem as any of my irl frens. Maybe it's because I'm not big on physical contact and I'm antisocial, but I find it easier to open up online even 😄

So I'd say make frens with people here, maybe PM/DM them and have conversations. It'll make you feel more cherished I think and you'll soon let go of the thought that you don't have enough frens~

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I've been through your situation as well; I've also been sick with fever for the past two days and during that time, I was miserable and had no energy to do anything due to a high temperature and a bad stomach. The medication I was taking, while helpful in the long run, didn't make it any better since I was constantly weary from it. All I wanted was for those days to end and a better day to begin.

 

Sickness and taking medication to heal it, does disrupt one's daily routine and mentality which can be aggravating because all the things one planned for a particular day must be pushed back to another.

 

There is no shame in being miserable from sickness; its normal to have mood swings from it.

 

As for how I cope with sickness, I stay at home to rest while looking ahead, believing that the next day will be better, as someone once told me "Time heals all wounds". Take as long as you need to heal up, there is no rush.

 

When it comes to the Reborn community, although I haven't been here for long, they are quite a close-knit group who look out for one another and make your contributions or messages worthwhile; something I rarely see in other communities.

 

 

 

 

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@JoStarNight and @Candy, thanks so much for your kind words. Today is indeed a new day, and I'm feeling much much better. I appreciate you all giving me some support yesterday when I greatly needed it!

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Good day, CodeCass.

 

I see that your condition have been improving physically and mentally, which is an awesome news! I'm sure you're going to be alright in the future too!

I hope you and everybody here have a good day!

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